Once
a year a special day rolls around, bringing with it a mixture of
emotions. Mother's Day means celebrating the fact there are two
people in this world who call me “Mom”. My husband and I were
blessed to have first a daughter and then a son. Lots of memories
come to mind, and it's fun to page through the photo albums
documenting them. Today we were able to gather as a family, to which
our son-in-law, two grandsons and a granddaughter have been added.
We are counting down the days to the arrival of grandbaby #4, and our
daughter indicated she thought Mother's Day would be a fine day to
have a baby. Although the official due date isn't until May 31,
anyone who is a mother can relate to those cumbersome last few weeks
of a pregnancy.
At
the same time we are basking in the joy of being family, my mind
wanders to another time and another place when I was a little girl
and another woman was “Mommy”. I see myself sitting on a stool
at the end of the kitchen counter, “helping” with the baking
projects. Other times the same stool was my perch while Mom
patiently combed the tangles out of my long hair. Inch by inch she
would tenderly separate a section and gently comb it smooth. This,
in turn, makes we wonder just how many times her fingers worked their
magic in forming a long braid on either side of my head before
sending me off to school or out to play. Growing up on a farm gave
me lots of opportunity to explore and stretch my imagination, and Mom
was always there to cheer me on.
As
others talk about what to get their mothers, I'm reminded it has been
over 20 years since I've had the opportunity to celebrate Mother's
Day with mine. God took her home in 1992 at the age of 68. In my
opinion, this was far too young, but someday I'm sure He will be able
to explain how it fit into His divine plan. I'm thankful my mother
planted in me a faith which looks forward to one day being reunited
with her in a heavenly realm far beyond this life as we know it here
on earth. Somehow I can picture her being able to watch as our lives
unfold, and sense she can still hear when I need to talk something
out or quietly express, “I love you, Mom!” and “Thanks for all
you did for me over the years!”
Tomorrow
I will thank God for the mother He gave me. At the same time I will
thank Him for the children who are the reason I can claim the title
for myself. With the role comes many challenges, but far more
blessings. I will remember the advice of a mother who claimed every
day was a new opportunity to ask Jesus into your life, and seek to
live, as she did, daily for Him. “Happy Mother's Day, Mom!”
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05/11/13
Bittersweet
Once
a year it rolls around, and once again the feelings rage battle in my
soul. For over twenty years now I've had to celebrate Mother's Day
without having a mother to hug, call, or buy a gift and card for.
While others are struggling to figure out what to get their mother, I
can only wish mine were here so I could have the privilege once
again. The best I can do is look at pictures and remember the
wonderful woman she was, and the
amazing impact her life had on mine.
She
was only 68 when God took her from us, and looking back, there are so
many questions I could have asked about her life. At the time,
however, I was busy raising my own children, and the opportunity
never seemed to present itself. Besides, her grandmother had lived
to be 101, and her mother was still going strong in her 90's. Who
would have ever thought her life span would be cut so short.
Although
she is not present in body, so often I sense her near, cheering me on
when days are tough and rejoicing with me as I watch my own family
grow. Planted here and there in my life are reminders of who she
was. Each time I bake, I think of her as I smell the vanilla bottle.
It was a ritual we went through every time I “helped” her bake
as a child. I also have the aluminum containers she used for storing
flour and sugar, as well as the glass juicer for doing lemons, and
often wonder how many times her hands used them before they became a
part of my kitchen. When I'm folding pillowcases or sewing on a
button, I remember the careful way she taught me to do it “just
right”. Many people have told me I look like my mom, but I
especially see her in my hands. God also passed on quite a number of
her features through me to my daughter, and there are times I find
myself smiling as I catch a glimpse of Mom in her.
And
so tomorrow I will enjoy the sweetness of having my children and
grandchildren with me. We will enjoy time with Bert's mother and
more of the family as we celebrated this day we call “Mother's
Day”. If it is like most years, there will be lots of smiles and
laughter, but for a few minutes I will find myself alone, wiping a
tear from my eye as I think of Mom and tell her in spirit how much I
still love her. One of these years, we will once again be able to
celebrate together. Until then, I will thank God for the years we
had together here on earth, and strive to follow the example she left
me of what it is to be a godly woman.
There
is a passage in the Bible which is often referred to as “The
virtuous woman”. You can find it at the end of the book of
Proverbs, chapter 31 and verses 10-31. Much of the description
matches who my mother was, and because of this she was loved and
respected by many in our community and beyond. Why God chose her to
be the one to give me life, I'm not sure. It was a blessing which
has helped me throughout my life, and given me the determination to
be the kind of person she was. So along with my “Happy Mother's
Day, Mom!” I will also say “Thank You, God, for blessing me with
her!”
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05/10/14 Perspective
So often over the past week, the reminders have been
there. . .special cards, bouquets of flowers and countless ideas of
items one might purchase to honor your mom for Mother's Day.
Although it is a special time to celebrate with my own children and
grandchildren, it is also a time I find myself mourning the fact I no
longer have to purchase them, as my mother left this earth at the age
of 68, back in 1992.
Each year, as the day approaches, I find myself looking
for other women to honor. There are two aunts remaining in my family
tree. One is my dad's sister, and the other is the wife of my
mother's brother. Both were a very special part of my growing up
years, and continue to be mentors and friends in my life.
Another special mom in my life is my mother-in-law, who
always has enough room for one more to love. With nine of her ten
children married, the family count is nearing the one hundred mark.
I recently came across a letter she wrote to me following the death
of my mother. She acknowledged the fact she could never replace my
dear, precious mother, but assured me she would be there for me if
ever I needed a “pep talk or whatever” and to let her know where
she could be of help. One cannot count the number of times I have
taken her up on this offer.
When thinking of special mothers, my best friend also
comes to mind. Together we faced learning the ropes of motherhood,
and now we are both blessed to be grandmothers. Although she lives
in the next state, it is comforting to know she is only a phone call
away whenever there are joys or sorrows to be shared.
Today, as I was once again thinking of my own mother, it
came to mind how young I was at the time of her unexpected death.
She died four days after an aneurysm in her brain burst. Doing the
math, I was only 35 when she passed away. Interestingly, this is the
age my daughter is now. A little more math, and I determined my
mother was 33 at the time I was born, which is my son's current age.
It gave me a new perspective on her life, as I considered it in
relation to the present ages of my own children.
Why is it some lives are cut short and others, like my
grandmother and great grandmother, are allowed to extend past the
century mark? At the time of my mother's death, I found myself
asking the question “Why?” repeatedly and often. At the same
time, it was my mother who had raised me to walk in faith with God
and to live by the words of the Bible. Therefore, who was I to
question His sovereignty and the span of life given her? Psalm
139:16 reminded me all the days planned for her were written in God's
book before even one of them came to be.
A song which gave me comfort during the days following
my mother's death is one entitled, “When Answers Aren't Enough”.
It was written by Scott Wesley Brown and Greg Nelson. To this day, I
like to share the words with people who have experienced a sudden and
unexpected loss. Perhaps they are words you can use today, or tuck
them away for a point in time they will speak to your heart.
Meanwhile, if your mother is still with you, be sure to let her know
how special she is and how much she is loved. As for me, I will be
asking Jesus to deliver my Mother's Day love!
You have faced the mountains of
desperation, you have climbed, you have fought, you have won.
But this valley that lies coldly
before you, casts a shadow you cannot overcome.
And just when you think you had it
all together, you knew ev'ry verse to get you through,
But this time all the sorrow broke
more than just your heart, and reciting all those verses just won't
do.
When answers aren't enough, there
is Jesus.
He is more than just an answer to
your prayer.
And your heart will find a safe
and peaceful refuge.
When answers aren't enough, He is
there.
Instead of asking, “Why did it
happen?”
Think of where it could lead you
from here.
And as your pain is slowly easin',
you can find a greater reason
To live your life triumphant
through the tears.
When answers aren't enough, there
is Jesus.
He is more than just an answer to
your prayer.
And your heart will find a safe
and peaceful refuge.
When answers aren't enough, He is
there.
